Recently, more days than not, I have had to hang my head in defeat because too many things were left undone. There were to many bad, unsuccessful days.
I've realized that a lot of my self-worth is tied up in being busy (or appearing to be busy), doing, accomplishing, contributing...
"So what have you done today?"
"Got any big plans for the weekend?"
"Where do you work?"
You know you have a problem when these simple phrases, used to engage conversation, send you (me) into a panic.
Everyone marvels at the multi-taskers and Martha Stewarts of this world. Everyone loves a hard worker.
Everyone approves of movers and shakers (and I'm not talking about my thighs, people. ;))
And, of course, you get bonus points if you work yourself so hard that you completely collapse emotionally and physically.
(Oh, bless her little heart! She is SUCH a hard worker...)
I want/need the approval.
I want/need the nod.
I want/need to be accepted.
However... Today is a new day.
I am going to make a conscious effort to change the way I think about being busy in relation to my self-worth.
Will I give up and become a sloth?
Probably not. :)
Will I feel like a complete and utter failure of a human being if I, for the fifth day in a row, forget to put the wash in the dryer and have to run the same wash for the sixth time? (True story, folks!)
No, I choose to believe that my worth is not determined by what I do or don't do. (Besides, the word on the street is that the sixth time's the charm!)